Say What?!

Part of moving to another country is learning to understand the locals.  It seems simple enough because the majority of kiwis speak English and you have to be able to do the same if you want to come live here.  That's where you get fooled.  I considered myself lucky because Ben is a kiwi, so I was familiar with his little expressions, the way he said things, his accent, and even how fast he talked.  We southerners don't get in a hurry when we speak, so imagine my surprise when I got to New Zealand and realized everyone spoke faster than a chipmunk on speed...and then you put a couple of them together having a conversation.  I had NO.I.DEA what 3/4 of the people around me were saying.  I did a lot of smiling and nodding initially, and I'm pretty sure my random smiles and nods earned me a few strange looks.

But wait, shouldn't I have had an easy time since I was used to Ben?  One would think, but then he got around his 'cuzzies' and 'bros' and he too got smiles, nods, and blank stares.  I know you think I'm exaggerating, but picture this, you're sitting at a red light, and some random dude yells "Aye, Ben!!" (yes, this happens ALL THE TIME, I swear I expected Ben to see someone he knew while we were over in Oz)  Ben leans over me and proceeds to yell back out the window to random dude "Ah, chur cuz!  Chu been up to bro?"  "Ah yeah, nah, yeah, just got back aye...shot over to Ragz for the day yesterday."  "Choooice!!" "Yeah, it was primo, but I got the chop from the kids and my wife cuz they weren't on holiday."  (they both laugh at this and I did too because laughing seemed appropriate) "Yeah man, that's us..light's green!"  "Sweet as!" "Catch!"

WHAT JUST HAPPENED THERE?!?!  Here's that conversation translated:  "Hey, Ben!" "Hey, friend!  What have you been up to?"  "I just got home.  I went over to Raglan for the day yesterday."  "Awesome!"  "Yeah, it was great, but the wife and kids were upset they didn't get to go because they weren't off of work and school."  "Gotta go, green light"  "That's alright!" "Bye!"  That conversation took place during the 10 seconds we were waiting for the light to turn, so yes, they too sounded like chipmunks on speed.  Ben claims kiwis don't speak fast, but they do...they just do! 

So, before you plan on coming for a visit or moving to another country, you should probably brush up on the local's lingo.  Luckily, you have me here to translate and give you a heads up on a few things you can expect to hear around our ways.  Like other parts of the world, you're going to get different little expressions and sayings depending on your exact location (example, other parts of the States don't say 'bless your heart' or 'y'all' nearly as often as southerners), but I can give you the gist of things.  Also, this is not THE definitive kiwi sayings list.  These are common phrases I hear.  If you're around a bunch of expats, you may not hear these phrases being said.

Oh, and one more thing...if someone asks you what you've been up to, don't say 'piddling around'.  I earned blank stares from Ben and his mother when I used this expression.  Piddling is going to the bathroom, so a few times I told them I had been peeing around the house all day. 

So, what you've all been waiting for...common expressions used around here!!

kia ora - hello
You will hear this and see this from the moment you log on to the Air New Zealand website to book your plane tickets.  This is actually Te Reo Maori, but you'll hear pakeha (not of the tribe) using it as well.

cuz - friend or cousin (non gender specific)

bro - male friend or brother

sis - female friend or sister

sweet as - you're welcome/no problem/yes (in agreement)/expression of admiration/I don't want to but I will/I'll be happy to
Example:  "Thanks for shouting lunch!"  "Sweet as!"
How not to use it:  "We're going out for a sweet as lunch."  "We're going to lunch and it's gonna be sweet as."  You may go to a sweet restaurant for lunch, but you are not going to a sweet as restaurant for lunch.  See the difference?  It takes some getting use to to be able to see how and when to use this correctly.

sweet - awesome, primo, choice
You may have a sweet new ride, you may go to a sweet new restaurant.  Sweet is used to describe a noun. 

primo or preemz - awesome
Example:  "The weather was priiiiimo!!"

mean - mean is not a bad thing, it's good! See sweet as, primo, awesome, or used as an emphasis
Example:  "You mean got told!"  "You mean got the chop" or "That party was meeeeaaaan!"

choice - may be accompanied by a thumbs up and can be a positive or negative.  See sweet as, primo, mean, shot
Example: "I got a new job!" "Ah, choice bro, that's mean!" On the other hand, if someone cuts you off in traffic... "Ah yeah, you're choice..."

shot - awesome/thank you/good on you or can be a negative when used sarcastically
Example:  "Shot bro, you're awesome" that would be a negative because someone just did something stupid or inconsiderate, but if they said "Shot bro, you're awesome!" that's a positive because they used it with a happy tone!

chur - when accompanied by the appropriate individual identifier, it is a greeting, farewell, acknowledgement, thank you, you're welcome, all good, no worries
Example:  "Chur bro, chu been up to?"

is that us - asking about someone's eagerness to do something
Example:  When getting ready to leave the house.  "Right, is that us?"  in other words "Are you ready?"

sorted - all good/ready/everything is taken care of
Example:  When getting ready to leave the house "Are you sorted?"  or "I sorted my doctor's appointment."

safe as - I've got it covered/no worries/sorted
Example:  "Can you make sure the back door is locked before you go?"  "Safe as"

got the chop - embarassed/denied/told off
Example:  You ask a girl out, and she says no.  You're buddies are in the background snickering because "You mean got the chop!"

got told - getting scolded/berated
Example:  You've been out too late with your friends, and when you get home you're partner is upset about this, so "You got told!"

cheap as - just that, cheap or inexpensive
Example:  "I just sorted tickets for our trip to Oz.  They were cheap as!"

a feed - a meal
Example:  We're heading over to mom's for a feed."

shout - pay for
Example:  "I'm shouting lunch."

good as gold - no worries/you're welcome
Example:  "Thanks for lunch!" "Ah, good as gold!"

nice one - thank you/primo/congratulations/awesome
Example:  "I scored a new job!" "Nice one, bro!"

too much - that's fantastic/that's awesome/thank you so much
Example:  "Oh, you're compiling a kiwi to American dictionary?  You're too much alright."

good on ya - depending on how it's used, it can be good or bad.  It is a call on behavior if you do something stupid or inconsiderate.  It can be used to say good job if you do something considerate.
Example:  "I've been cleaning house all day." "Good on ya, darling put your feet up."  On the other hand, if you just drop a glass and it shatters "Good on ya"

no worries - all good/you're welcome
Example:  "Thanks for helping clean up the shattered glass." "No worries, cuz"

stuffed - tired
Example:  "What's for dinner?" "I can't be bothered cooking, I'm stuffed."

she'll be right - it'll be okay
Example:  "You think the number 8 is gonna hold the muffler on?" "Yeah mate, she'll be right" (number 8 is fencing wire)

on to it - clever or getting things done
Example:  "I've been sorting through the kids stuff getting everything organized today."  "Ah, you're on to it."

church it up - exaggerate
Example:  "I'm stuffed!  I've been busy all day!" "Don't let her church it up, she's had her feet up all day!"

save it for Sunday - don't exaggerate
Example:  "I'm stuffed after cleaning all day!"  "Save it for Sunday!"  You'll also hear "Don't church it up, save it for Sunday!" or "Save it for Sunday, don't church it up!"

you don't know - whatever
Example:  "Man City's gonna lose tonight!"  "Shut up, you don't know!"

yeah, nah, yeah...(may have an 'aye' before you receive the explanation)- yes or no depending on context and tone, or may just be used to start a sentence
Example:  "Did you get out to the beach this weekend?" "Yeah, nah, yeah, we were going to but the wife had to shoot out to her mom's." or "Yeah, nah, yeah, we got out there on Saturday."

what's your buzz - what's your problem/what are you on about/what do you think you're doing
Example:  You're having a rant at the kids, and your partner walks in "What's your buzz?"

This is just a smidge of what I hear and try to understand.  It's gotten much better, and I use some of the little expressions myself.  However, I still get lost at times...let the whanau get together and start slinging around Maori words, and I am left trying to decipher through the muddle of confusion that Google Translate can't figure out.  If I get too lost, I remember to...

How to Adjust (As Pain Free As Possible)

Guess what...I'm not writing about what I originally planned to write about.  I know I said I was going to fill you in on a haka, but I've got a bit more fact checking to do before I'm comfortable putting that piece up.  Instead, you're going to get to take a walk down memory lane with me because I realized I have been in New Zealand for six months, and I'm going to talk about adjusting to life in a new country.

Before I left, everyone was giving me tips on how to adapt and what I should and should not do.  Everyone also said to "give yourself six months before you decide you don't like living there".  I read and researched ways to make life as an expat less difficult, and for the most part, all of the advice was spot on.  I did say for the most part.  So many times I have read and heard "If you don't like it, you can always move back home."  I think that is the worst way to look at making a big move.

I mulled that piece of advice over in my head on several occasions, and one day while washing dishes, it hit me.  I won't ever "go back home" for more than visits.  I know some of you are thinking "never say never because you don't know what the future holds". No, I don't know what the future holds, but I can tell you if Ben and I ever moved to the U.S., it wouldn't be "going home".  Even if we moved back to Alabama, it will not be what I left.

My life is different, my family in Alabama didn't cease to live because I'm no longer there, and my friends have moved on and filled in my empty slot.  This doesn't mean that they're less important to me or I to them, but it does mean there's no going back to how things once were.  Time didn't stop once I moved away, and things have changed, including me.  The glasses that color my world aren't the same, so I would never see my home in Alabama like I use to.  When I had this great epiphany, I was saddened by it, initially.  It's hard to let go of the past, and life in Alabama is my past.

Letting go of what once was doesn't mean forgetting it, because your past is part of who you are.  I thought about that for a bit, and then I cheered up.  I will always be a southern girl, but this southern girl knows that she has to live in the present and future.  I keep up with my family and friends, but I don't look at my life thinking I can always go back.  It's made adapting to life here much easier for me.

Another thing that's made life in another country easier is realizing I'm in another country.  So many expats get caught up in trying to make their new home the same as their old home.  They don't like the way the New Zealand businesses shut down without notice over summer break, they don't like how kiwis are more concerned with going to the beach than driving a new SUV, they don't like the food, they don't like the dress, cost of living is too high...you get the picture.  A lot of expats want here to be like "there".  Sorry, it doesn't work like that, and once I realized that, things here became easier for me.

For the most part, I embrace the kiwi culture, and I love most aspects of it.  Sure, there are some things I don't love, such as someone offering me tea and it being hot with milk in it, but I don't dwell on things I can't change.  I incorporate what I miss into my life, but I don't expect kiwis or New Zealand as a whole to change to accommodate me and my culture.  I made the choice to move here, and in doing so, I accepted the responsibility of adapting to a new way of life.  I think the quicker expats learn cultural assimilation, the easier they will find life in their new home.

Part of living in a new country also means making friends with the locals.  There's a whole lot of foreigners in New Zealand, and you'll also find support groups for expats, forums on the internet, cultural affiliation get togethers, etc.  That's great!  There's an initial base of support to help transplants get acclimated to their new life, but after a certain point it kinda becomes a crutch.  See, a lot of immigrants want to hang out with immigrants, and then they get to talking about the differences between here and where-ever they're from. After that, they start grumbling about things they don't like here.  They end up disgruntled, missing 'home', and angry because they expect NZ to adapt to their way of life.

This is why I say get to know the locals.  You'll hear some people claim that outsiders aren't welcome, but I can assure you, that's not the case.  EVERYONE knows I'm not a local.  My accent gives it away, and out of all the immigrants here, I get asked "Where are you from?"  I've not had anyone be rude or make snide remarks about Americans.  I think it's because I'm rather friendly and don't sit around going on and on about New Zealand's inferiority to my home country.  Kiwis are a proud bunch, and they're not going to take kindly to an outsider bashing their country and wanting to make it more like 'home'.  The way they see it is if you don't like it here, go back home, they didn't ask you to move here!

Which brings me to another key feature of successful immigration....come here, or there, or wherever you think you might want to live!!  I hear and read about so many people that up and move somewhere sight unseen, or in New Zealand's case, sight seen on the big screen.  Sure, there are some people that pick up and move to a place they've never traveled to, but for the average person, you're setting yourself up for failure.  I didn't move here without knowing what I was getting into.  I visited last year, and I didn't stay on the tourist path either.  Ben made sure I got to see what life as a local was like.  I saw the prices of food, clothes, houses, gas, etc.  It's easy to get caught up in the beauty and touristy parts of NZ, but I had to keep in mind life here wasn't going to be as a tourist.

Also part of not being a tourist meant I had to deal with immigration and local licensing authorities.  I'm not going to get into what all that entailed right now, but I will tell you that I did so much reading before my sudden move.  Do your research before deciding to immigrate, and be prepared to jump through lots of hoops.  Don't expect special consideration to be given to you for your particular situation because you won't get it.  I have been frustrated numerous times, but I successfully managed to work my way through it.

Now you know what I've done to adapt to life in Aotearoa (Maori for Land of the Long White Cloud aka New Zealand), and I'm sure they can be applied to any move.  We'll see if my little bag of tricks are still working for me in another six months, once I'm out of the honeymoon phase.

If any of you have tips to make life in a new place easier, I would love to hear them!!